You Don’t Need Bigger Goals Next Year. You Need a Higher Floor and a Smaller Start. – Part 2 of 3

‍Discomfort, Non‑Choices, and Your Bigger Why
‍Modern life is built to remove almost every kind of friction; food, rides, entertainment, and distractions are always one tap away. The side effect is that the very discomfort that builds resilience, self-respect, and long-term success gets engineered out of daily life unless you bring it back on purpose.

Part 2 is about choosing the right kinds of discomfort, turning serious goals into non‑choices, and connecting all of it to a why that actually pulls you forward. Read part 1 here

Why Intentional Discomfort Matters
Voluntary discomfort means choosing small, controlled hardships: hard workouts, cold mornings, fasting, saying no to indulgences, when you could easily stay comfortable. Studies and expert commentary suggest that this kind of chosen adversity raises your tolerance for stress, builds mental toughness, and trains your nervous system to stay calmer under pressure.

Over time, practicing discomfort creates a “buffer” that makes everyday challenges feel more manageable: difficult conversations, business setbacks, or parenting stress no longer overwhelm you the same way. You also develop more gratitude for the comforts you do have, because you regularly experience life without them.

The Power of Non‑Choices
Every serious goal comes with built‑in non‑choices: things that are simply off the table if you are truly committed. If you want to run a race, prepare for a bodybuilding show, or hit a specific revenue target, then skipping training, sleeping too little, or constantly breaking your prospecting blocks is not just “less ideal”, it is incompatible with your desired outcome.

Thinking in non‑choices shifts you from “Should I do this today?” to “People like me just do this by default.” That identity-based framing makes discipline feel less like a daily argument with yourself and more like following your own internal rulebook.

You can start by defining non‑choices around:

• Sleep (e.g., no screens after a certain time, non‑negotiable bedtime before early training).
• Movement (e.g., running or walking days that are never traded away for convenience).
• Work (e.g., a protected prospecting block that does not move for minor requests).

Enjoyment vs Addiction
There is a crucial difference between enjoying something, like wine, beer, dessert, or social media, and using it in a way that edges into addiction. Healthy enjoyment is intentional and limited; you actually taste, notice, and appreciate the experience. Compulsive use is different: you drift past enjoyment into numbing, preoccupation, escalating use, and consequences that start to touch your health, relationships, or work.

A useful diagnostic question is: “Do I genuinely like this, or am I using it to avoid feeling something?” Another is: “Could I comfortably go without this for 7–14 days?”

If the idea of a short break causes anxiety or strong resistance, it might be a signal to look more closely.

Saying “No” to Protect Your “Yes”
When you commit to real goals, you will have to say no to things that used to be automatic yeses: late nights, extra drinks, mindless scrolling, or another episode instead of sleep. At first, your environment may push back, friends might tease you, colleagues may test your resolve, or family members might not understand why you are suddenly more serious.

The shift that makes this sustainable is focusing less on what you are giving up and more on what you are protecting. When you say no to another drink, you are saying yes to a clear head and a strong run in the morning; when you leave the party early, you are saying yes to being the person who keeps promises to themselves. Over time, people either adjust and respect your boundaries or drift to the edges of your life, and both outcomes are useful information.

Let Your Why Do the Heavy Lifting
Discomfort is much easier to carry when it is tied to someone or something bigger than your own preferences. Identity-based habit research shows that behavior change sticks better when it grows out of “who I am” and “who I am becoming,” not just “what I want to achieve.” Running early, lifting consistently, or prospecting daily feels different when your why is:

• “I want to be the parent who can move, play, and travel with my kids and grandkids.”
• “I want to show my clients and team what long-term consistency looks like.”
• “I want my future 60- or 70-year-old self to thank me for the capacity I built now.”

A powerful exercise is to write one sentence that connects your goal, your identity, and your why:

• “I am a disciplined, healthy person who trains and eats well so I can stay active with my family for decades.”
• “I am the kind of leader who does the hard work when no one is watching, so my business can support the people I care about.”

Make It Real: A 7‑Day Discomfort and Non‑Choice Experiment
To move from theory to practice, try this simple 7‑day experiment.

1. Define one identity sentence.
Write a clear statement of who you are becoming in 2026 (for example: “I am a fit, focused parent who keeps promises to myself.”).
2. Choose one microdose of discomfort.
Pick a small, safe hardship you will practice daily for 7 days:
   • Finishing your shower with 30–60 seconds of cold water.
   • Getting up 30 minutes earlier to move, write, or plan.
   • Saying no to one usual indulgence (late-night snack, extra drink, or social media window).
3. Set 2–3 non‑choices.
Write down a few behaviors that are simply not compatible with who you are becoming for this week (for example: “No alcohol on weeknights,” “No phone in bed,” or “No cancelling my run unless I am sick.”).
4. Reflect with one question each night
Before bed, ask: “Where did I choose discomfort that aligned with my why today?” Capture a one-sentence answer in your notes app or journal; this reinforces the identity you are building and helps your brain connect discomfort with pride instead of punishment.

Choose your identity sentence, one microdose of discomfort, and 2–3 non‑choices for the next 7 days, then share them with someone you trust so they stop being ideas and start becoming who you are.

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In all that we do, let us seek wisdom, discipline, courage & justice.

Be well,

Keita

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